2012 Off topic thread(basketball,movies,etc whatever)
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Just like my normal self. But I am just more and more awkward in social situations. This was a girl I went to HS with, so it was basically a HS reunion. My wife was just like "WTF is wrong with you, people are trying to talk to you, and you just keep blowing everyone off." I really hate glad handing, schmoozing, and I have a really hard time carrying on conversations when I have no interest. Its like I don't even care to feign interest. I am just like "oh reall, who cares". It isn't like I took my pants off and laid on the couch in a church, I just don't care very much at all about pretending to care about stuff. I am realizing that pretending to care about stuff is really the entire basis of all human interaction. Everyone seems to be in agreement that I am asshole now.
FWIW, I felt really weird in the room (it was a giant room at a country club) with the brain cancer girl in a wheelchair while everyone yucked it up. I was thinking "don't you fuckers know there is imminent death among us?" I was preoccupied with her presence and I thought the whole thing was weird the way they were holding her out as a hero, but no one was talking to her.
I have always been a little bit like this. I have done the whole Office Space thing in interviews in the past where I just can't take all the BS, so I just tell the truth... it really freaks people out btw. But it is starting to take over everything, and I don't even care. I don't even care if something "catastrophic" happens like losing my income. I just think, well, I will just live differently, not the end of the world.2012: +19.33
2012 Parlay project: +16.5uComment
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^^I get where you are coming from being socially awkward in some social situations. There really just isn't shit to say most of the time, especially around groups of people you don't know/care to talk to. I feel like I come off as an asshole in a lot of situations where people say something jokingly to me at work and I just think it's stupid so I say "yeah" and give some fake smile or laugh. I just cannot act like most of the population and somehow act like I am interested and get stuck in some stupid fucking conversation and dumb shit.
I guess I can relate to your first paragraph. I don't really think like this: "don't you fuckers know there is imminent death among us?". I will definitely bullshit and tell people what they want to hear when it comes to getting by/ahead in school or work.Comment
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Honestly, I'm getting more like this myself. I just don't care and don't have the energy to pretend. Although, in my case, I think it's equal parts not caring and also just hating everything and disagreeing with everything anyone says. I don't know if that says more about me or everyone else, but whatever.Triple-six killers in this motherfucker runnin shitComment
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I find that I also have a hard time giving a fuck about what other people say or think or are going through, but I do genuinely feel that I SHOULD care. Living life in a world where people are just going around and being cynical and only caring about themselves seems like a really shitty world to me. So even if I have to fake it until I make, I do think it's important to try.I heart cockComment
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Triple-six killers in this motherfucker runnin shitComment
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Alright. I will try and watch episode 1 tomorrow.
I also heard about these shows and am interested:
True Blood
Dexter
Ok, that's it. Prison Break sounds interesting from the title alone...what's it about?
I have also started watching Criminal Minds...pretty interesting. I like Law and Order SVU better though.Comment
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Well, I just meant because the cancer girl was there, and she was all puffy and in a wheelchair. She can't remember her kid's names (yet she did know me). I am not preoccupied with death at all... i just meant that the girl is expected to die any day.2012: +19.33
2012 Parlay project: +16.5uComment
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Yep. That pretty much sums it up. I wasn't like this before, but now I am, so it is sort of strange for me. It is like I am watching myself go farther and farther down the road that ends with me being old and alone, yet I don't try to turn around because I don't care.Honestly, I'm getting more like this myself. I just don't care and don't have the energy to pretend. Although, in my case, I think it's equal parts not caring and also just hating everything and disagreeing with everything anyone says. I don't know if that says more about me or everyone else, but whatever.2012: +19.33
2012 Parlay project: +16.5uComment

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